Choudenshi Bioman: A Sensational Sentai of the ‘80s

Choudenshi Bioman (Super Electronic Bioman)

Year: 1984

Number of Episodes: 51, approximately 20 minutes each

Fansubs viewed: Grownups in Spandex 

Subtitle quality: Excellent.

In a lot of ways, Choudenshi Bioman is the quintessential Sentai series for the ‘80s. Despite subtitled versions of earlier Sentai gaining some traction in places like Hawaii, Bioman was the first in the series to enjoy lots of success outside of its home county. (See inset, “Bioman Around the World.”) It was also the first Sentai that Haim Saban pitched for Americanization, around 1987. Of course, Saban wouldn’t see his wish fulfilled until 1993’s Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers, which utilized footage from a different Sentai series entirely.

It’s tough to say how the Saban adaptation would have turned out: the pilot is missing in action as of this writing. But Bioman in its original Japanese form is nothing short of spectacular.

Synopsis (No spoilers)

The New Gear Empire, led by the cybernetic Doctor Man and the cast of Phantasy Star 2 his dastardly Mecha Humans, set out to prove the doctor’s scientific superiority to the people of Earth. But Instead of just inventing ‘80s iPhones or something, they send down wave after wave of robots to kill pretty much everybody, even your mom. Their first target: Japan.

About 500 years earlier, C3PO wannabe Pebo traveled to Earth after his home planet, Bio, was destroyed. Anticipating a battle in the future, Pebo showered a small group of peasants with “bio particles,” which they passed from generation to generation.

As Doctor Man attacks in the present time, Pebo springs into action, locating those who carry bio particles within them. Now a group of five teenagers with attitude upstanding young people must tap into their long dormant Bio power to become the Biomen and put an end to the mad doctor’s relentless onslaught. 

Seriously, though, Phantasy Star 2 rips off Bioman's designs. HARD.

See?

Evaluation (Spoilers)

Beneath the surface of Choudenshi Bioman’s Super Sentai stereotypes lies something special. Maybe it’s the sleek, flashy suits that gives Bioman its charm. Maybe it’s the badass, guitar and synth soaked soundtrack. Maybe it’s consistency:  Bioman avoids the hot-‘n’-cold temperament of Dairanger, so most episodes are fun to watch.

Or maybe it’s Bioman’s ability to get viewers to ignore its flaws and watch with a childlike sense of excitement.

No one is going to accuse Bioman’s heroes of being shining examples of character development. Pink Five plays and flute, Yellow Four is an archer, Red One is the stoic leader. That’s about it. The best written is the original Yellow Four, who has more personality in 10 episodes than Green and Blue have in 50. Then she dies. Bummer.

Like Battle Fever J, once the team calls for Bio Robo, anything interesting the show had going comes to a screeching halt. It would help if the enemy ‘bots were more integrated into the storyline, instead of just metallic fodder for Bio Robo to cut to ribbons.

However, shifting the focus from the monster of the week allows the show’s recurring villains to take center stage. Doctor Man oozes with evil authority. Mason is cool and calculated, like some kind of businessman turned assassin. Monster and Juo, despite their Bulk and Skull-style foul-ups, are menacing adversaries. Also like Bulk and Skull, they genuinely care for each other: if a Bioman hurts one, the other comes running to protect his friend. You know something? Monster and Juo may actually be the first gay robot couple on television.

I’m dead serious.

Why would anyone build a gay robot? Well, why not! Monster and Juo are the best.

Bioman gets a passing grade for its underwhelming finale. Stuff gets real in the last four episodes and the seeds are planted early enough that plot points don’t feel tacked on. The good guys win, the bad guys lose, and Pebo fulfills his destiny as a giant Duracell battery for Bio Robo, so that’s all good.

Where the finale fails is the consciousness circuit subplot, which goes nowhere. The audience is led to believe at various points that the bad guys will get said consciousness circuits and turn good. Without spoiling too much, that’s not quite how it goes. I’d have loved to see Mason in an office job, Doctor Mann in a lab somewhere curing cancer, Monster and Juo living together Ernie and Bert-style, and so on. With villains who were more interesting than the main cast, this might be Bioman’s biggest sin.

Speaking of missed opportunities, let’s focus on Silva, the hunter from planet Bio. Though he was introduced many episodes before the finale, he always seemed a little out of place. Like, what’s he doing when the Biomen aren’t around? A few times he shows up just to be a dick for seven seconds and remind us that yes, Virginia, there is a random anti-bio robot running around unchecked. Despite his sweet theme song and the hype when he’s introduced, Silva winds up being nothing more than a way to push the plot forward.

But I nitpick. In a word, Bioman is awesome.

Bioman: The Movie

The Bioman movie is notable for a largescale battle between the Biomen and nearly the entire New Empire Gear army, but not much else. It also introduces the Cat Army, which includes Ferrah Cat and some numbered palette swaps that we never see again. The plot follows some kids, and a map, and it’s dumb. I know I should go into more detail, but it’s not worth it. If you skip it, you’re not missing much.

Overall

Of the four Super Sentai series I’ve seen so far, Bioman is unquestionably the best. I really dig Dairanger, but nearly half the episodes are outright duds, unfortunately including the finale. In contrast, I’m hard pressed to think of a single episode of Bioman that had me praying for Zordon to put me out of my misery. To put things in context, going back and subtitling the Battle Fever J movie was a chore – not because of the work, but because I had to watch BFJ again. That experience really drove home the fact that Bioman is a joy to watch.

Aside from a boring movie and a lackluster-yet-appropriate conclusion, Bioman’s a fun ride throughout. If you’re looking to get into Super Sentai but don’t care about Zyuranger, Choudenshi Bioman is a great place to start.

Rankings so far, from best to worst (order within tiers also reflects ranking):

GREAT

Bioman

Diaranger

GOOD

Zyuranger

FAIR

Battle Fever J

Next up: Changeman! Well, unless I watch Gekiranger first. Or maybe something else? Hmm. I’ll get back to you on that. 

There's just so many Super Sentai to pick from!

Battle Fever J: A Rocky Start to Super Sentai

Battle Fever J

Year: 1979

Number of Episodes: 52, approximately 25 minutes each

Fansubs viewed: Nemet 

Subtitle quality: Good to extremely poor, depending on the episode. Currently these subs are the only way to watch the entire series in English. Battle Fever J was aired with subtitles in Hawaii in the early ‘80s and Nemet’s subs are based on these, so 99 percent of their flaws are due to the sketchy source material.

My first real exposure to Battle Fever J came on a day when I literally couldn’t move without pain. My wife headed off alone to the wedding we were supposed to attend, and I, burning with fever from the worst flu I’ve ever had, hurt so bad I couldn’t even operate a PlayStation controller. So I propped myself up on the couch and started marathoning what was long considered the first Super Sentai series. (Later, two previous series were grandfathered in to the Super Sentai family, but that’s a story for another day.)

I sometimes wonder if my opinion of BFJ was tainted by my physical and mental state at the time. And I’m sure it didn’t help that I just kept watching episode after episode, long after I wouldn’t have called it a day, because it was easier than trying to stand up and turn it off. However, no amount of second guessing can save Battle Fever J from being an overly repetitive, ho-hum entry into the Super Sentai series.

Whether it be coincidence or cosmic conspiracy, illness rears its ugly head as I write this review today, this time a nasty sinus infection. Well, at least I can move this time.

Synopsis (No spoilers)

Japan, the late 1970s. General Kurama, a high-ranking officer in Definitely Not Interpol, assembles a team of five special agents who have been trained for combat (and awful dancing) throughout the world. The agents become the super-powered heroes Battle Fever J and take on the global threat of Egos, a shadowy band of villains whose motivations for evil are often unclear, but always involve making giant, pissed off robots.

Review (spoilers)

I had high hopes for Battle Fever J, the follow-up series to J.A.K.Q Blitzkrieg Squad. Though it was only the first four episodes, J.A.K.Q. was the first Sentai I ever watched. J.A.K.Q. is more adult than I would have ever imagined for a kids’ show, mixing elements of a crime drama with typical Sentai troupes. So Battle Fever J, from two years later, should have been just as good, right?

Not so much.

From the minute you see the freaky costumes, you know something’s very wrong with Battle Fever J. Battle Japan and France look pretty good, but Kenya, Cossack, and especially Miss America are downright disturbing. I can’t put my finger on it, but… I mean, you have eyes. You probably see it too.

If you’re hoping for an ongoing plotline akin to the Green Ranger saga in Zyuranger/MMPR, or even just any kind of plot progression besides throwing another bad guy down a hill, you’re going to be disappointed with Battle Fever J. Most episodes are formulaic standalones and unlike Zyuranger, it gets real old, real quick.

It doesn’t help that the budget must have started running out near the middle of the series, as Battle Fever J utterly abuses stock footage in later episodes. How many times am I going to have to watch Miss America throw those same knives? Do we really need to see Battle Kenya scurrying along that wall for the millionth time? Couldn’t you guys have filmed more than one stock explosion? And when the BFJ team leaps into Battle Fever Robo, the real fight is trying to stay awake. It’s enough to make you want to strap on a motorcycle helmet and film new scenes yourself, just for something different. 

What saves BFJ from the depths of unwachability is a handful of memorable characters. Battle France provides a respite from the more generic cast members by injecting a modicum of humor into the show. He’s a little bit like Lance in the original Voltron. The right hand man of Satan Egos, Heda provides an over the top performance, acting just as much with his facial expressions as with his booming, overblown voice. And late in the series, gun-toting cowboy Jin takes the helm as Battle Cossack, providing viewers with some precious character development right before he rides into the sunset with the rest of the cast.

Heda's superpower: Overacting 

My favorite though is Battle Kenya, who is energetic, goofy, and genuinely funny. Kenya is the only one who finds it odd that the bad guys seem to have an endless supply of giant robots, and he straddles the fourth wall with comments like “Do they own a warehouse?” and “Where do they keep them all?” They’re throwaway lines to be sure, but sometimes, that was all it took to keep me from fast forwarding thought yet another mind-numbing mech battle.

There was also a Battle Fever J movie, which I was told is just a recut version of episode 5. That’s actually incorrect. It’s 100 percent episode 5 with no changes. I know this because I subtitled it. If you want to get your hands on it – it’s a good example of what you’ll see in the rest of the series – mosey on over to this download page.

Overall

Horrifying costumes, sleep-inducing plotlines, and egregious overuse of stock footage are three strikes against Battle Fever J that are tough to ignore, but the series isn’t ready to head back to the dugout just yet. There *are* enjoyable episodes of BFJ, but they’re mostly stacked either in the beginning or near the end. Cut the filler, and you’ve got a pretty decent Sentai series. But as it stands, BFJ teeters on the edge mediocracy, only barely worth your time.  

My recommendation for regular guys and gals is to Google which episodes are worth seeing, watch those, and leave the 30 or so filler episodes for hardcore Sentai fans only. (Super quick guide: 1, 5, 24, 33, and 52.) Unless you’re super curious about the origins of Super Sentai, I’d avoid Battle Fever J in favor of some of the better seasons, like Zyuranger, Dairanger, and the current series, Kyuranger. Come back to BFJ when you’re running out of the good stuff.

My current Sentai rankings are as follows, broken into tiers:

GREAT

Dairanger

GOOD

Zyuranger

FAIR

Battle Fever J

With the last Sentai of the 1970s under our belts, let’s jump into the ‘80s! Join me next time for Super Electronic Bioman. Spoiler: It’s awesome!

A Regular Guy’s Guide to Fansubs: File Formats, Distribution, and More

Well regular folk, we had to address the spandex-clad elephant in room at some point: not every Super Sentai series is available from Shout! Factory for free on their website, or even to purchase on DVD. So far, they’ve released five seasons with plans for a sixth underway:

-          Zyuranger, which became Mighty Morphin’ season 1

-          Dairanger, which became Mighty Morphin’ season 2

-          Kakuranger, which became Mighty Morphin’ season 3

-          Ohranger, which became Zeo

-          Carranger, which became Turbo, and

-          Megaranger, which became In Space, coming in September 2017.

Zyuranger, North America release

That’s more than 300 episodes right there! That seems like a lot, right? Now you might be wondering, “how many seasons of Super Sentai could there be, away?”

Japanese television is currently airing Space Sentai Kyuranger, which is Super Sentai season 41. Forty-one. FORTY. ONE. That means Super Sentai is more prolific than Friends, Grey’s Anatomy, or even The Simpsons.

Suddenly, six seasons doesn’t seem like all that much.

So how are we going to watch Battle Fever J, one of the first Sentai, as I promised at the end of my Dairanger review? We’re going to delve into the wonderful world of fansubs, of course!

What are fansubs?

Fansubs are just what they sound like: unofficial translations created by fans, applied to video files, and traded online. The sometimes they’re hard to find, the quality varies wildly depending on the fansubber, and there’s a bunch of file formats that might be intimidating to a newcomer. But that’s one of the reasons I created this blog: to teach other regular guys and gals the things I had to learn the hard way.

Let me make something clear, however: downloading these shows, even if they’re not available where you live and in your language, is still piracy, so do so at your own risk. Also, please support the official releases either by watching them on the Shout! Factory website (Zyuranger and Dairanger) or buying them (Zyuranger though Megaranger). You’re probably tired of the “Pirate with Morals” speech you’ve heard 1,000 times by now, but please buy their shows so they release more sets. I’m speaking from experience when I tell you that the quality of the Shout! Factory seasons is excellent.

A bumper for "Bioman," subbed by the fan group Grown-Ups in Spandex (see upper right corner)

What are some fansub formats?

Fansubs come in a variety of formats to suit a variety of needs, but the ones you’ll come across most are MP4 and MKV.

You’re probably already familiar with MP4 files. Most standalone videos nowadays are in this format, and most computers have MP4 players built in. This format is good if you want to watch movies on your TV through devices like the Xbox One, as I do, or if you’re just looking for the easiest option.

MP4s are the second most common fansub format. If you ever see a “hardsub” option, they’re probably talking about MP4s. That’s because the subtitles are “burned in” to the frames of an MP4, meaning you can’t turn them off. Also, a lot of times the MP4 option is in standard definition (SD). I don’t know why that is, but if you’re looking to save hard drive space and don’t mind 480p resolution, that’s the way to go.

AVI and wmv files have most of the same properties of MP4s, but they’re outdated formats. If you see them floating around, it probably means you’re working with translations from at least five, possibly ten years ago. Might be best to search for a newer translation at a higher definition.

MKV files are the preferred format of the fansub community. Unlike MP4s, MKVs keep the video and the subtitles separate, meaning you can turn them on or off. This is called “soft subbing.” The advantage here is being able to swap subtitles out manually if you find a better translation, or you can have more than one subtitle file included with a video and switch between them at will (maybe Spanish and English in the same file, for example). The MKV option is often the high definition (HD) option too, at least when it comes to Sentai made after 2008-ish, including Shinkenger and beyond.

You’ll probably have to download an MKV player because they don’t usually come standard. I recommend VLC Media Player, but just be careful what you agree to installing. Suggestion: Just the player itself, not the other garbage it offers you.

In case you were wondering, I like MP4s because they play nice with my PC and my XBone, requiring no extra fuss. But I also like HD video, which is often a hallmark of MKVs. Sometimes I’ll use Handbrake to convert MKVs into MP4 files, but it sure does take a long time. Mostly I break down and just watch the damn MKV on my computer instead.

MP4s are the “regular guy” option, so maybe start there. If you find yourself wanting higher video quality or wanting to explore the world of fansubs more thoroughly, switch to MKVs once you’re comfortable.

One last thing to note: .ass, .ssa, and .srt files are raw subtitles. They can be applied to video files using programs like Handbrake, but it’s easier just to find them already attached to the video file, especially if you’re looking for a hassle-free viewing experience. Don’t worry though, you’ll rarely come across these in the wild if you’re not looking for them.

How do I get fansubs?

Now that you’ve picked your format, it’s time to actually download something and watch it.

The most straightforward way to get fansubs is the direct download (DDL) method. Many fansubbing groups host their work though a site called Mega.nz, where users can download shows one episode at a time. On a decent internet connection, it’s a simple, easy option. Mega.nz has a download limit of about 5 gigs per day per free user, but I doubt you’ll be watching 10 to 15 Sentai episodes in one sitting, so it shouldn’t be a big issue. 

But not all fansubbing groups have direct download pages. Others, like the popular Over-ti.me (currently translating Kyuranger), invite users to post their own DDL links in the comments section for each episode. So if another user hasn’t taken it upon him- or herself to be philanthropic, you’re out of luck. Secondly, if Mega.nz ever goes down, much like Megaupload did a few years ago, there goes 99 percent of your DDL options.

Space Sentai Kyuranger, currently playing in Japan and translated by Over-ti.me 

But on the plus side, you should be able to find most of the popular Sentai in this way. One great resource for DDL is Jps317’s “Folders” blog, which contains excellent Sentai shows like Dynaman and Gokaiger. Jps317’s work was a great boon to my early forays into Super Sentai fansubs. Check it out.

The second download option is torrenting. It’s more advanced, riskier, and can be more frustrating, but it’s also the key to finding the obscure stuff. You remember programs like Napster and Kazaa in the ‘90s? Those worked by letting you download files directly from someone else’s computer. That’s torrenting in a nutshell.

Nowadays there’s a bunch of torrent programs, but my recommendation is Bittorrent. You’ll have to download and install it on your own – I’d rather not link to it in this blog – but a quick Google search should get you where you need to go.

A torrent program is useless without telling it what to download and where to get it. You’ll need to go to a site that keeps track of torrents. Until very recently, nyaa.se was the undisputed king of Super Sentai torrents, but on May 1, 2017, the owner shut it down out of fear of legal action. This scattered Sentai torrents to the winds, but most fansubbing groups have chosen https://anidex.info/ as their new home. Sentai for Regualr Guys (SfRG) has a profile page there too, if you want to visit.

As Stan Lee would say, with great power, comes great, uh, downsides. If users stop “seeding” a file (hosting it for others to download), you’ll have to wait for them to come back online before you can grab the rest. The end result can be weeks of waiting to finish your download, or worse, a torrent you can never complete. You’re also at the mercy of someone else’s internet connection, which means you might be downloading at a brisk 2 MB a second, or crawling along at dial-up speeds. The more you get into Super Sentai, the more you’ll be leaving your computer on all night downloading torrents.

Also, I’m not wild about connecting directly to a bunch of other people’s PCs. I’ve never experienced a virus or security issue that I’m aware of, but it’s just something to keep in mind.

There’s one last option if you’re not into amassing hundreds of gigs of men in helmets punching other men in rubber suits, and don’t mind a moderate amount of malware. You could always stream your fansubs from KissAsian.com, which sounds like a shameful mecca of tentacle-based filth, but is actually a repository for countless Asian drama shows no one has ever heard of. Also spyware. It’s sort of like Netflix, if Netflix were illegal and run by some kind of evil(er?) version of Mark Zuckerberg. There’s a shocking amount of content on this site, but as you might expect, it’s as shady as a late ‘90s Nintendo ROM site. Shortcomings aside, this might be a good option if you’ve got a junker PC and a decent internet connection.

Conclusion

Ultimately, the easiest thing to do is grab one of the DVD sets, crack open a beer, and enjoy something that’s both new and pleasantly familiar. That definitely seems like what a regular guy or gal would do. But if you’d like to explore beyond what you saw on Power Rangers when you were a kid, I invite you to delve into the world of fansubs. It can be intimidating, but with these tips, you should be able to get your foot in the door.

All that’s really left is to pick a series and start watching, but with 40-plus seasons of Super Sentai to choose from, that too can be daunting. Maybe you go in order from Zyuranger onward until you get board. Maybe you watch in the order I write this blog. Or maybe you forge your own path. In any event, have fun with it.

As for Sentai for Regular Guys, we’ll be taking a look at 1979’s Battle Fever J very soon. Stay tuned!

Gosei Sentai Dairanger: Highest Highs, Lowest Lows

Gosei Sentai Dairanger (Five-Star Squadron Dairanger)

Year: 1993

Number of Episodes: 50, approximately 20 minutes each, and one movie

Subtitles viewed: Shout! Factory official DVD release. You can watch the whole series for free at the Shout! Factory website. 

Subtitle quality: Excellent

Like many other regular guys getting into Super Sentai, my next stop is Gosei Sentai Dairanger, the series that came immediately after the spandex gateway drug that is Zyuranger. It also helped that the series was available for free on the Shout! Factory website, but I digress.

As the follow-up to Zyuranger, Gosei Sentai Dairanger has awfully big shoes to fill, at least in the minds of longtime Power Ranger fans. So how does it stack up?

Pretty darn well, actually.

Synopsis (No spoilers)

Thousands of years ago, but definitely not in the time of dinosaurs, three (definitively not five) tribes flourished in China: the Dai, the Shura, and the Gorma. Everything was cool until the Gorma went the M. Bison route and tried to take over the world, albeit without Raul Julia or Bison dollars. The war raged for 5,000 years between the Dai and the Gorma – I guess the Shura are the Super Sentai equivalent of Switzerland – culminating with the mysterious disappearance of both. With no one to keep them in check, the Shura spread out and populated the Earth.

Cut to modern day Japan, where the Gorma suddenly resurface and continue their bid for world domination. The mysterious Master Kaku, sensing this new threat, rounds up five teenagers with attitude (also strong Qi power) to become the Dairangers!

Oh, and later some pervert little boy becomes Kibaranger, kind of like Justin in Power Rangers Turbo but much less rage inducing.

Evaluation (Spoilers)

You ever hear an album where all the songs were pretty good, like a solid 7/10? Something like “River of Dreams,” Billy Joel’s unspectacular 1993 farewell to songwriting. Okay, I bet you also know an album where about half the songs were just awful, but the other half were eargasmic, like U2’s uneven “All That You Can’t Leave Behind” from the futuristic year 2000. Despite half the album being terrible, I bet you listed to that one a hell of a lot more than the mediocre one.

What I’m getting at with this strained metaphor is that Dairanger, despite about 15 awful episodes, more than makes up for its shortcomings. Compared with Zyuranger’s good but never great consistency, Dairanger is clearly the better series.  

To start, Dairanger’s mystical Chinese ambiance is simultaneously more relatable and more interesting than Zyuranger’s ancient warriors gimmick. It’s almost like you’re watching an old-school kung-fu flick that just happens to include Super Sentai, a welcome departure from Zyuranger’s kid of the week formula. The episodes with Red Ranger’s nemesis, Jin Matoba, nail this esthetic particularly well. 

The series looks like it was filmed mostly in the fall, with bare trees and brown grass, evoking all the joy a crisp autumn afternoon. A badass theme song and stock music that borrows more than a bit from “The Imperial March” punctuate the action. And the Gorma’s tux-wearing foot soldiers are the best dressed putties around.

The Dairangers characters are developed pretty well for a Super Sentai offering. For example, Kazu is my favorite yellow ranger of all time, thanks in part to his sweet drunken boxing style and his cool, confident demeanor. Also, it’s implied that he’s in a relationship (or at least flirting) with an almost certainly mentally challenged man who just happens to morph into a giant robot turtle sometimes. Oh, and Kazu once beat a man-sized, sentient piece of tofu in a drinking contest. In contrast, the coolest thing Trini ever did was have an ugly doll with a stupid, stupid name who grew to the size of a blimp and tried to kill her.  

Also, this show loves whacking people in the dong. Seriously, it happens all the time, to the point where it stops being a joke and starts making you wonder about the mental state of the writers.

Unfortunately, Dairanger’s lows are just as potent as its highs. A small example is the little boy who becomes Kibaranger and his obsession with sex. His rapey actions towards the only female ranger are supposed to be funny I guess, but especially though a modern American lens, they’re just disturbing.

A bigger problem is the abundance of throwaway episodes, like the arch with ancient peacock woman Kujaku or the “Three Gorma Stooges” who are obsessed with the Blue Ranger. I can take a few crumby plotlines here and there, but where the series really falls on its face is the nonsensical ending. Throughout Dairanger, the story seems to be leading up to an impressive conclusion: the rangers’ mentor reveals himself to be a Gorma and attacks them, Kibaranger’s mom bites the dust, and for a while, the rangers are forced to continue fighting without their powers.

So what’s all of this leading up to? Gormas are made of clay, of course, and melt with you stab them. Oh, and Kibaranger is suddenly the size of a child, despite having morphed into an adult literally every other time. And the Dianger’s grandchildren show up at the end and are Dairangers too! And apparently nothing anyone ever does matters, because the cycle of good and evil is never-ending, making the entire series seem pointless. It’s not incredibly stupid and disappointing at all!

CLEARLY A CHILD

Except it is. Dairanger’s war crime of a finale is such a sore spot that it puts a damper on the entire season. That’s really too bad, because Dairanger is something special when it’s not stifling its awesome cast, suits, and mechs with bargain bin plotlines and sucktastic baddies.

Dairanger vs. Power Rangers (Season 2, Mighty Morphin’)

Zyuranger to Power Rangers was mostly a simple affair: give the teens a reason to morph, then cut to Japanese fight scenes. But the decision to retain the Zyuranger suits for MMPR season 2 severely limited the amount of footage Saban’s team could cop from Dairanger. In some ways, the comparison between Dairanger and MMPR2 is almost an unfair one to make, since so many Dairanger elements never found their way into North America. The result was a Sentai mishmash that had to work hard to be even a little bit coherent.

There were some iconic storylines in MMPR2, mostly involving Tommy’s journey from one ranger persona to another and the teens’ frightening new adversary, Lord Zedd. But after we lose the green ranger, gain the white one, and run out of Zyu2 footage (extra Zyuranger footage commissioned by Saban to extend MMPR), it’s all downhill. Desperate editing, recycled monsters, and aimless, meandering plots really drag down MMPR2. And it doesn’t help that new rangers Rocky and Aisha are basically placeholders for their more popular predecessors.

Billy discovers a hole in the plot, MMPR season 2.

While bad episodes were peppered throughout Dairanger, culminating with the aforementioned dumpster fire that is the series’ ending, most of MMPR2’s unbearable shows are found in the second half of the season. Going back to my music metaphor, instead of one pretty good album and one album with a few bad tracks, we now have two albums of uneven content. In this case, Dairanger just has more great “songs” than MMPR2. Sometimes I think that Saban should have just started airing select subtitled Dairanger shows in place of MMPR2’s last 20 episodes. It wouldn’t have made much sense, but it would have made for a great season. (“Meanwhile, in Japan…”)

If Saban had cut MMPR season 2 short, it would have been easy to say that Power Rangers outclassed Super Sentai again. But as it stands, Dairanger is clearly the better series.

Overall

Gosei Sentai Dairanger succeeds in being excellent despite bland episodes and a putrid finale. Coming at this series from a Super Sentai to Power Rangers angle yields interesting results, because most of the footage was left on the cutting room floor. This allows Dairanger to have more of its own identity than Zyuranger did in the eyes of a Power Ranger fan, and that’s certainly a good thing.

If you can put up with occasional disappointments – akin to socks and underwear hidden amongst the Nintendo games in your Christmas loot – Dairanger offers memorable characters, monsters, and plots. Highly recommended, though I also recommend that you temper your expectations for the last two episodes.

With the two Super Sentai seasons regular guys would most likely want watch under our belts, let’s get out of our comfort zone and bit and head back to an era before Mighty Morphin’. Join me next time for what was long-considered the first Super Sentai program, 1979’s Battle Fever J!

SPOILER: The costumes are horrifying.

Kyoryu Sentai Zyuranger: Not quite the rangers you remember

Kyoryu Sentai Zyuranger (Dinosaur Squadron Zyuranger)

Year: 1992

Number of Episodes: 50, approximately 20 minutes each

Subtitles viewed: Shout! Factory official DVD release. You can watch the whole series for free at the Shout! Factory website. 

Subtitle quality: Excellent

There’s no better place to start one’s Super Sentai journey than with the series that introduced millions of Americans to the “spandex team vs. rubber monster” genre. In case you’re some kind of caveperson, emerging from your cryogenic sleep and stumbling upon this blog in your first moments of reanimated consciousness, you probably know that footage from the Japanese Super Sentai series is recycled to make the Power Ranger franchise. Though Kyoryu Senti Zyuranger was the 16^th Super Sentai, it was the first to be adapted for English speakers, splicing scenes of American actors with Japanese fighting footage.

The result was the legendary Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers. MMPR was a megahit when it debuted in 1993, and even decades later, it’s still ingrained in the American cultural consciousness. The comparison between it and Zyuranger is unavoidable, but I’m going to do my best to review Zyuranger as its own show before getting into which series had the best villains, who handled the Green Ranger better, and which cast I’d rather do Jell-o shots with. (Spoiler: It’s both, at least for the shots.)

By the way, Zyu is pronounced “zew,” almost like the word Jew, but with a Z instead. Say it out loud. Go ahead, aim for the Z.

So without further padding, it’s, uh, Zyuranger time!

Synopsis (No spoilers)

Millions of years ago, when dinosaurs roamed the Earth with Palm Piolets and 28.8 dialup modems, five human tribes flourished with aid of the mystical Guardian Beasts. Everything was cool until Queen Bandora lost her son, Kai, and blamed the dinosaurs for the tragedy. After selling her soul to The Great Satan, Queen Bandora was imbued with dark, magical powers and declared war on the dinos. In the end, the five tribes were virtually destroyed and the era of the dinosaur came to an end.

With no other options, the Guardian Beasts sealed Witch Bandora away. But after much more than 10,000 years, Bandora is accidently set free, and decides that it’s time to conquer Earth. Sage Barza, Bandora’s white mage counterpart, wastes no time in reviving the five legendary warriors – one from each of the ancient tribes. They become Earth’s only defense, the Zyurangers!

Evaluation (Spoilers)

I don’t know what I was expecting going into Zyuranger, but I’m pretty sure it wasn’t wizard janitors, gun-wielding gnomes, and ancient warriors who, despite hanging around in the current time, hardly ever wear anything beyond their bajillion-year-old robes. On some levels, the marriage of fantasy and modern day is charming: one minute we’re in 1992 Japan and the next, we’re on some ancient island, or in the mystical woods or something. But there’s too much focus on fantasy elements for the show’s own good, like the long-running and terribly boring dinosaur egg subplot. Fantasy themes are a double-edged sword that simultaneously provide Zyuranger with its identity while dragging it down like an anchor.

Barza, in his day job as a janitor. Can you hear him now?

 The child-centric plots can be grating. Nearly every week, the Zyurangers meet up with some annoying kid for young viewers to project themselves on. Seeing as how I’m pushing 35, it really started getting on my nerves after a while. But Zyuranger was meant to be a kids’ show and here I am writing a nearly 2,000 word review 25 years later, so I guess the joke’s on me.

Speaking of, good thing there’s all those children lying around, because Bandora really loves plotting their murders all the time. The implication is that losing her son 170 million years ago made her hate kids somehow, but it’s not explained very well. Call me crazy, but want my villains to have a motivation beyond “kids suck.”

You’d think a child-murdering psychopath like Bandora would be cold and heartless, but in between attacking kids and tormenting Burai with green (potentially scented) candles, she sometimes hosts impromptu dance parties. That’s right, Bandora and friends drop what they’re doing and just start singing and dancing. There’s a difference between comic relief and tonal suicide, and Zyuranger just gleefully leaps across that line at the oddest times.

As it turns out, the Guardian Beasts are the five pieces that comprise the Zyurangers’ mech, Daizyujin. Unlike other Sentai/Power Ranger shows, they’re not robots, but sentient gods. They can communicate with the Zyurangers, giving them advice and taking on a secondary mentor role when Barza’s not around.

The idea of sentient mechs is kind of cool, but it feels a little out of place. If Daizyujin can act on its own, why do we even need the rangers to pilot it? And why are the Guardian Beast such dicks sometimes? For example, Geki (red) didn’t want to fight Burai (green) in one episode, because Burai is his long-lost brother. Daizyujin was watching the battle, and instead of stomping Burai into a fine green powder, it shot Geki with lasers in an attempt to goad him into fighting his sibling. See? Total dickery.

The final episodes are a bit of a letdown. Without the threat of Buari’s death hanging over the viewer’s heads anymore, the series’ ho-hum conclusion goes down exactly as you would expect. The rangers beat bad guys, the stupid dino eggs hatch, and…  Grifforzer (Goldar) and Lamy (Scorpina) have a baby? Ok, so it’s not all bad. And hey, the villains don’t get killed at the end, instead being sealed away and sent back out into space.

It’s a kid-friendly concussion for a child-centric series.

How is ZyuBabby formed?

Zyuranger vs. Power Rangers (Season 1, Mighty Morphin’)

Zyuranger is better than Power Rangers, wouldn’t you think? I mean, Power Rangers is essentially a hack job, right? Well, I’m shocked that I’m saying this, but the first season of Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers is the superior show.  

Yes, I’m adjusting for nostalgia. Listening to self-made bootleg tapes of PR tunes like “We Need a Hero,” Ranger merchandise everywhere, the mix of joy and shame for loving a show designed for kids ever-so-slightly younger than I was – I did my best to put all that aside and look at the two series objectively.  And while they share plenty of elements, Zyuranger and Power Rangers are two very different shows.

A lot of early MMPR plots are paper-thin one-offs, but that changed with the introduction of the Green Ranger. You ever see The Dark Knight, the second in the Christopher Nolan Batman trilogy? The tension doesn’t quit in that movie, keeping the audience on-edge. On a smaller scale, the same can be said for Tommy’s the five-part origin, “Green with Evil.” The threat of the Green Ranger is ever-looming, leaving the other five rangers constantly in fight or flight mode, even while they’re attending to their normal lives. Episodes pick up right where they ended, so cut out the opening and ending credits and you wind up with a pretty badass movie.

Zyuranger takes the opposite approach. The episodes that introduce Burai are standalone pieces where he shows up, moves his plot thread along, and leaves again so the rangers can concentrate on other things. Though later multipart Zyuranger episodes do a better job of keeping the tension going, there’s almost always a clear break between parts.

You're telling me this is a flute?

It’s weird to think of MMPR as having character development and an overarching storyline, but as the episodes chug on, that’s exactly what we get. Billy begins the series unable to defend himself without morphing, but by episode 60, he’s fighting on par with the rest of the team. In the meantime, Kimberly starts to shed her selfish valley girl attitude, and Tommy loses and partially regains his powers, severely affecting the entire team’s morale over an extended period of time.

We don’t really get that in Zyuranger, with character development relegated standalone episodes. For example, we find out that black ranger Goushi’s sister taught him how to be a great warrior before she died. But don’t worry if you missed it, because the revelation doesn’t change his character in any way. By the next episode, we’re already worried about something else and Goushi has been reabsorbed into the Zyuranger team collective. Burai’s death near the end of the series is one of the only events that has lasting consequences, and that’s mostly because we’re down a ranger. Don’t get me wrong: Power Rangers does the same one-off thing, but within the context of the larger plot evolution I mentioned before.

There’s little things too. Power Rangers’ rock ‘n’ roll soundtrack fits the action better, the everymen-turned-heroes concept is more relatable than ancient warriors in modern times, Tommy losing his powers is a more satisfying plot device than Buari’s weird expiration date, and so forth.

On the plus side, Zyuranger is lightyears more coherent than MMPR’s erratic plots thanks to not having to splice up footage like Jason Voorhees at a national Boy Scout meeting. After watching Zyuranger, it’s hard not notice the jarring jumps into the middle of the action that MMPR makes. There’s also the matter of the yellow ranger switching genders, from a young man (ironically) named Boi in Zyuranger to Trini in Power Rangers. Frankly, Boi and Trini had similar body types, so it looks OK to me. But the switch drives some people mad, and you’re one of them, I get it.  

In the end, Zyuranger just isn’t as fun as good ol’ Mighty Morphin’. Well, at least for season 1, that is. But that’s a conversation for a different day.

Overall

As something that’s been built up as legendary since the days of MMPR, I really wanted to like Zyuranger more than I did. But the truth is, it would be a somewhat unremarkable Sentai entry were it not for the fact that it begot the global powerhouse that is Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers. 

Let me stress that Zyuranger isn’t a waste of time. It’s certainly worth watching, especially if you’re a fan of Mighty Morphin’. But as the episodes wear on, you’ll find yourself asking, “Is this it?” Much of that is because Zyuranger had mighty big shoes to fill. But even without the inescapable shadow of MMPR looming over it, Zyuranger is a fun but kinda forgettable experience.

You’ll enjoy watching Zyuranger and noticing all odd ways its footage was recycled for MMPR. It’s like meeting the Wizard of Oz. This is the man behind the curtain, people. But there are better Sentai out there. Speaking of…

Join me next time for Gosei Sentai Dairanger!

I know the guy in the middle, but who are those other weirdos? 

It's morphin' time: A Sentai for Regular Guys overview

I’m not an otaku, a television expert, or fluent in Japanese. I’m just a regular guy who likes Power Rangers.

My first exposure to Japan’s long-running, spandex wearin’ Super Sentai occurred in 1993 when the world was introduced to Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers. My young self didn’t realize it at the time, but that team of “teenagers with attitude” was actually lifted straight out of a Japanese show called Kyoryu Sentai Zyuranger, the 16^th in the Super Sentai series.

At first I was amused in a Mystery Science Theater 3,000 kind of way. But with the introduction of the evil Green Ranger, crazy new robots, and a rockin’ soundtrack, the show blossomed into a great way to spend my afternoons.

And then I got old. Too old, I thought, to waste my time on a kid’s show. And so, a few months before a new Ranger team rocketed into space, I traded the teens in brightly colored spandex for the gritty antihero of HBO’s afterhours classic, Todd McFarlane's Spawn.

As time marched on, I completed college, got a job, moved out of my parent’s house, and got married. You know, all that cliché regular guy stuff.

But old fascination with Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers stayed with me, tucked away somewhere in my mind. One day, out of the blue, I wondered to myself about that show before Power Rangers – the one from Japan. I jumped on Google and did a little research. And a little more. And a little more after that.

By the end of the week, I was halfway done with Zyuranger and hungry for more.

Sentai for Regular Guys will chronicle my voyage through the 40-plus seasons of Super Sentai, recording my thoughts and experiences through the lens of a regular guy. My hope is that other regular people like me – the ones who grew up with Jason and the gang battling Rita Repulsa’s evil minions – can learn from my journey. I hope that my suggestions will save new Sentai fans from spending time on a series that isn’t for them, and to highlight the shows beyond just Zyuranger that an old MMPR fan might want to get into.

I want to give back to the Sentai community’s more seasoned fans as well. I’ve learned quite a bit in this last few months about video file formats, creating and encoding subtitles, and which Sentai series haven’t been subtitled yet. As I said, I don’t speak Japanese – but I do have a few tricks up my sleeve. (See here for details.)

My first order of business is to review Kyoryu Sentai Zyuranger. But if you’d like to jump into the action now, it’s available to watch for free on the Shout! Factory website. 

In the meantime, as Zordon would say, may the power protect you. (Or something less lame. I don't know, I stopped watching after Turbo.)